Times were simpler before I found the Deadlands.

Before then, the idea of the spiritual was a sort of distant fact. Yeah, there was no denying they were extant; only a fool would have believed otherwise, but I was a able to sleep at night knowing that most souls couldn't be arsed to fuck with me.

Then, I got a tip from an associate. That's typically how these stories began.

'Nessie,' he said in that sickeningly smooth tone of his. 'You like priceless stuff, dontcha?'

Fuck him, he knew that I did. He knew everything I liked. Everything.

The world was so easy to deal with when you were on your knees succumbing to the whim of some other being. I'd had enough of that in private chambers, and I decided it was time I didn't let any assholes muck about with my autonomy.

So, how convenient was it that this guy suddenly had the perfect outlet for my frustration?

Steal from the Eastern Deadlands. Eastern... 

Eokia. Fucking hell, Eokia.

Granted, back in the day, Eokia wasn't really that big of a problem for me. Sure, I didn't like all the weird monsters stalking the lands, animal people and otherwise, but I wasn't willing to go on some genocide crusade against them for their mere existence. Couldn't say they shared that same level of respect for me, though.

Why would they? I was just some random redhead. A random redhead with the power to undermine the silly little boundaries people like to put up.

Planeswalkers do that. Or rather, we did that.

Where was I? Right. The promise of priceless treasure. Good ol' treasure. I was armed with a gun, but I had my powers on standby just in case things got hairy. And, trust me, they almost invariably did. That's the nature of thieving.

When I got to the location in question, I wasn't necessarily surprised by what I saw. Ruins, lots and lots of ruins, probably of some long dead kingdom of monsters ransacked and left to time's devices.

Beyond the occasional spooky squirrel - oh boy, so terrifying - there wasn't much to be wary of. The place was as quiet as the mice that scurried the areas within it, and just about as filthy. I dove deep into each of the halls, taking in the sights. Beyond some pilfered pieces of gold and silver dropped on the floor, there wasn't much to scavenge.

This place was pretty much gone, by all accounts. Everyone who was here seemed to have up and vanished, and judging by the way that the ruins looked, I was probably the most action this place had seen for some centuries.

I was actually really surprised - not many predatory beasts were here. Given all the rodents scurrying about, you'd think they would come flocking to this place. But, no, something seemed to keep them from here. What, too hard to catch your food?

Nah, that's not how predators worked. Even if one got the memo and left, others would move in since it meant less competition. Animals were predictable.

Even with that bit of knowledge, the most dangerous things I found were some half collapsed roofs and a rather violent looking spike atop a crumbling castle wall.

So, there was the million dollar question - where they? Why weren't they here? Why wasn't there a bigger presence here in general?

I pondered this while I sat down on a step. I'd been searching for some eight hours and didn't find anything worth going home with. The whole excursion seemed like a bust...

At least, until something started to stir from behind me. I turned my head to see something open up behind me.

A doorway.

That looked either promising or deadly. Still, the emptiness of my pockets did the deciding for me.

I ended up somewhere I didn't expect... a massive city built into a waterfall. Lush greenery covered what I made out as priceless gold lining the city's exterior, which started at the basin, climbed up the face of the rock near the falling waters, and extended far into the expanse on the water's surface.

"God's fucking nipple..." I remember breathing out.

The 'Deadlands' didn't seem like the correct way to address this place. It was soon to be the 'Poached Lands' when I was done with it.

"It's good to be alone in these cases, hehe..."

Heh. Why was I so damned stupid?